Small Acts of Kindness

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By Lynne Elwinger, O.C,D.

In these times when the bad news of tragedies and atrocities, famines, and human and planetary calamities is instantly transmitted around the world, here is some electrifying good news. Small acts of kindness can change the world!

When the realization of the power of the kind act unfolded before and within me recently, I was overwhelmed with feelings of awe and hope. The concept of the apostolic potential of small kind acts, simple enough for a child to understand and yet profound enough to reflect upon for a lifetime, both astonished and excited me. It was a little like seeing that something I had been looking for had been right in front of me all along but I had failed to see it. I felt more than a little foolish. But the overriding emotion was one of great joy. I feel hesitant to write about kindness because I know only too well my own failures in it. However, the awe and the hope clamor to be shared; perhaps because that is how I “got it” in the first place.

 

Rachel’s Tears

A year ago on April 20, a 17-year-old girl who had clearly come to understand this idea and to practice it in her life, was one of the 12 students killed at Columbine High School in Colorado. There is evidence that her lived belief in God contributed to her selection as a target. On Holy Thursday, the anniversary of this tragic event, as my prayer was moving into the Passion of Jesus, I unexpectedly heard about the life and death of Rachel Joy Scott. Her father, Darrell, was speaking at a memorial gathering, along with classmates and teachers, of memories of ways in which her life had impacted their lives, and about her desire to walk her Christian talk with integrity. I later read a fuller account of her life in her parents’ book, Rachel’s Tears,1 and I found in both places Rachel’s missionary desire to start a chain reaction of kindness that could affect the whole world. I had an intense personal experience of the truth of this concept. Rachel’s commitment to being consciously kind and the way she lived it in everyday life is both inspiring and challenging. Now many others, especially young people, have expressed a desire to continue her mission. Her vision reminds me of St. Thérèse’s Little Way, spoken in contemporary terms. I feel a deep gratitude for her life and her fidelity to the God working powerfully within her.

Commitment to Kindness

Most of us feel some sense of helplessness when faced with all the ills of the world of which we have become increasingly aware. We would like to do something that could change things and make a difference. But, realistically, we don’t know where to begin. I would like to suggest the possibility of a commitment to kindness as a starting place.

Perhaps we could begin by considering how we ourselves feel when someone is kind to us. How do we feel inside? I find my energy increased and my spirit uplifted and I also experience a greater ease in being kind myself. Next, we could look at the sorts of things that hold us back from being kind, such as fears, woundedness, stress, and being over-extended and fragmented in our fast-paced modern lifestyles, for example. An analysis of one’s personal lifestyle from this perspective can be quite enlightening. We can also examine each day’s happenings and interior reactions in light of the kindness factor. These activities begin to focus and make more concrete for us what kindness is about in our own lives. I would like to get to the place of being able to consider each event and interaction with another as an opportunity for a kind act. This doesn’t always mean doing the “nice” thing, however. In some situations, the kindest thing is to be honest, telling the truth with love. Being kind does not mean compromising integrity nor does it reside in false praise. At times, the kindest act is to respect another’s wishes for no act at all from us.

Kind acts are like little epiphanies of God’s love in our world. The sharing of kindness becomes sacramental as all involved participate in the greater Kindness that is the essence of God incarnate in our world within, among and around us. Small acts of kindness given or received expand our choice for what is life-giving, drawing us toward the wholeness which is our birthright from the moment of creation. Kindness magnetizes goodness even when it is in hiding, inviting the receiver to open up, relax, and be more inclined to be kind. Kind acts remind others to be kind, in the same way that seeing another car’s headlights on, as dusk begins, reminds us to turn our own lights on. We don’t have to agree with someone, or even like their behavior, to be kind to them. Committed kindness is something anyone can do. It knows no barriers of age, race, sex, economic status, education, or health. Kindness is infinitely ecumenical.

A Network of Love

If groups of us would make a commitment to consciously increase the small acts of kindness we do in our daily lives, we could build a world-encircling network of love that would eventually help heal and transform our world. Rachel Joy Scott, in her brief lifetime, gave us a wonderful example of the courage to make the effort, to begin over and over, to keep trying. Now the torch has been passed to us. We are invited to become the sparks that enkindle the torches lighting the way to a new and better day for all people and for our earth. Small acts of kindness can change the world.

 

NOTES

¹Nimmo, Beth & Scott, Darrell. Rachel’s Tears. Nashville, TN:Thomas Nelson, Inc., 2000.